Cell phone madness strikes home

Both Prince and Princess have one or two kids in their class that have cell phones. (Remember, they are only 10 and 8.) Deacon has a plan to earn his own money and buy a phone by saving his allowance. I do love how he offers to get the mail or sweep the walkway for an extra quarter a day. I don't think that he truly understands how far away $5 a week is from $80 a month.

Princess has a different plan. She once saw a commercial where the daughter talked the parent's ears off and they gave her a cell phone so that she would talk to someone else. This has become her plan. This has been my experience for the past few months.

I will give her, she is persistent. You might remember this photo of her last year, out in public, talking out loud on her toy cell phone to her imaginary friend.

This is her talking on my cell phone with Grandpa about her Christmas list. Such pure joy written all over her face.

Trust me, after months of listening to every thought that has passed through her mind, I am starting to think a cell phone is a good idea. I was able to hold out long enough, however, for her to stop trying to persuade me and start working on Tom.

I left her alone with Tom for an hour to run to the store and before I got back, this is the email I received.

"We were talking about phones and Princess just ask me how old I was when I got my first phone. I told her 35. Her eyes got big and she said "really?" Then she asked "was it was embarrassing?" I said "of course not...why would it?" She said "because some people say the rule is that you get a cell phone when you are 13. But I think it doesn't matter how old just how grown up you are." Then she paused and asked "you think I am pretty grown up don't you?". Of course I didn't tell her that cell phones weren't invented until I was 35."

The cordless home phone as been the closest she can get to a cell phone and she carries it around the house with her. Last week, I drove to the end of the street to get hot dog buns for lunch. In the 8 minutes it took me to go to the store, purchase the bread and make it back to the house, princess called me twice from the home phone and talked to me for 3 minutes each time. Nothing was wrong, she just wanted to talk on the phone and felt empowered by the ability to contact me whenever she wanted.

Tom just laughed when I told him about this, so while he was out of town this week, he asked our little princess to call him after dinner and before bedtime. She was so thrilled he wanted her to call him. We didn't quite live up to the plan of twice a day, but she did love coming down, picking up the phone and calling him. We are still working on the leaving voicemail messages and dialing the number correctly. If she thought her cell phone depended on it, she will have this technology perfected by Sunday.

So I am not winning mother of the year.

Today's event... Princess wanted the training wheels off of her bike. She was sure she was ready. I took them off and helped her ride around the cove.

I let go of the bike and she successfully coasted across the cove with ease and stopped before she got to the drive way. "Ok, I am ready to start the bike by myself, " she reassured me. "How about one more time and then I will let you get started by yourself?" I asked.

So she went around one more time by herself, but this time when I let go, the bike wiggled a little bit and she tried to jump off and caused the bike to spill. She managed to not even break a nail, however, the bike hit her foot and hurt her. In that moment she decided SHE WAS NOT GOING TO GET BACK ON.

We all know that if you end with that experience in mind, there is no way you are ever going to get back on. I could not explain that sufficiently to my sweet princess. There was no way I was talking her back on to that bike. I insisted, I pleaded, I negotiated and she stormed off to the house. So I ordered her back onto the bike and then came the tears, the screaming, the threatening and the "I HATE YOU!"

I couldn't help but laugh. Her anger, in her own way was helping her deal with her fear, but was not helping her overcome it. I tried to reassure her. I tried to talk her through it and then I just snapped some pictures before the moment was gone.

Ok, maybe these are not going to be the photos we hang in the hallway, but this is how it went down.

Taking pictures didn't help lighten the mood. Instead it fueled her rage. I put down the camera and pushed her around the cove and she began panicking and screaming. All of the noise created quite the audience. I am sure the neighbors who came out to observe me pushing Rena around on her bike while she screamed at the top of her lungs, "YOUR TRYING TO KILL ME!" quickly rushed in to call child services.

Tom came home in time to catch the finale of this live theater event and was kind enough to take some video footage for you to enjoy.

Despite the tears and the fear. She did do it! And did she take a victory lap? No. instead she marched her bike into the garage and parked it, probably forever.

So we ended on a happy note, well happy compared to 20 minutes earlier.

After dinner, Princess had a moment to compose herself and we reviewed the pictures and the videos with her to talk about what was working for and against her. I tried to explain that this might be the last "first time" I ever get to catch on film. That I wasn't snapping pictures to make fun of her, but to remember this moment because she was growing up so fast.

Sometimes I think all of my talking and explaining goes in one ear and out the other. As she walked up the step to go play on her computer for a few minutes before bed, I wondered if this was one of those times. I logged onto Facebook and received a message from my little angel.

Thank you, Rena, for the moment I won't forget, the story I get to share and just being who you are. You might be my greatest challenge and my survival might be my greatest success (if I make it), but I wouldn't trade this moment, this life with you for anything in the world.

Sometimes, it's the little things.

Princess got here ears pierced back in December and has not been subtle about her desire for dangly earrings. She doesn't want little charms, she wants the shoulder sweepers. I really don't like big earrings on little girls and I have been trying to steer her to something more age appropriate.

Today, I realized that this was something really important to her and that there was room for middle ground. So I let her wear a pair of antique dangling earrings to school today.

I don't think her feet touched the ground as she walked to the car to go to school. She said that, "they just made her feel good." Then she comment on the earrings I was wearing (that she had given me for my birthday this year), about how they were artisan pieces and how they must make me feel good.

I told her that they made me feel the exact same way that she did right now to which she replied, "That's really good."

In that moment, we connected. Not the mother-daughter connection, we were just girls appreciating all the girl stuff. So simple.

Kid tested, mother approves.

For this first night in a really long time, I only had one errand to run after work. I waited until after dinner when the princess was already taking a bath an prince was collecting the trash before I left them alone to drive down the street to deliver some Girl Scout cookies.

I had been gone for maybe 8 to 10 minutes and was almost back to the house when I get a call from the home phone. I immediate knew that something is wrong. Prince explained that while he was collecting the trash, Callie had managed to get into one of the bags and sneak out a chicken bone.

I panicked remembering when my dog, Rufus, got a chicken bone lodge in his throat. "Try to take the bone away from her, hun. I am pulling into the garage now." "Oh I already did mom, but she also got into the chocolate pudding." Long pause. "It's ok, hun."

I didn't understand at that point in time the significance of the statement that he made. I was so worried about the chicken bone that I didn't even process what Prince was worried about. I pulled in and went into the house. Prince had continued his chores and I heard Callie in her kennel and knew that he had done his best to control the situation. We had a long talk about the choices we had to make for Callie. That she would never leave the trash alone. Why it was so important that we keep our food away from her and why she would always be sneaky and try to get it.

Princess just stared as I gave prince the talk then she softly interjected, "Is Callie going to die?" Prince started to cry. Not just crocodile tears, I mean uncontrollable. THEN I got it. Prince was worried about Callie eating the CHOCOLATE pudding and thought he had killed the dog.

"Oh NO NO NO, baby!" I reassured. To help put their minds at ease, I sized up the probable amount ingested, got the ingredients package out and called the emergency vet. She assured us that the worst symptom the dog might experience was diarrhea.

Prince cried some more. I tried to explain how proud I was of him. He was home alone and he made all the right choices. He called me immediately. He took the food away from Callie and put her in the kennel. And he owned up to the accident. I couldn't have asked for anything more in that situation and I couldn't be more proud of this young man.

It proves to me that not only is Prince more mature, but he is also putting into action those things that he is learned and ready to take on new responsibilities.

Will you be my friend?

Maybe my corporate life has bled a little too far into my personal life. After we got home from school and the kids were rummaging through their book bags to find their homework, Prince brings me a handwritten form.

When I inquire our little man responds, "I told my friend, Alex that this was all of the information that you require in order for me to spend the night. We are best friends and I really want to go to his house. And don't worry mom, I went ahead and wrote out a list of all the rules that I have to follow while I am at his house because he is one of those kids that says shut up. He knows I can't say that. And I can't watch movies or games that have blood. He is ok with that."

In thirty years we have gone from "Will you be my friend. Check yes, no, maybe" to "I am going to need you to fill out and submit form 1015 BMF." And if that friendship requires an over night visit, I will need subsequent form 1020 ONP and that needs to be authorized by your people and my people. I will see you in a month.

What next? I can just see Prince conducting Six Sigma projects to figure out which of his little friends uses their playtime most efficiently.

On the one hand, I am so proud that he has taken such initiative and really thought through eliminating any road blocks to his goal, but I am going to go out on a limb here and say MAYBE I need to loosen the reigns a little.

Ode to Jen.

After Tom proposed, and I agreed, we changed and went downstairs to the restaurant "Currents" in the River Inn. We had an incredible meal while we talked about wedding plans, how to tell the kids and our families. We agreed that any wedding plans should come after we sat down with the kids and made sure that they are onboard with this whole idea. Even if they were initially excited, we wanted to give them some room to work through their feelings.

The next morning, we headed to Jen's house to pick the kids up. The kids were not going to understand what engaged meant. I knew Jen would be happy for us and I was banking that if we broke the news to Jen first, that her reaction would help guide the kids.

When we got to her house the kids were so excited that they were both telling us about how much fun they had at the same time. Our prince was dancing all around the living room as he talked and the princess was pulling on my arm, leading me to "her" room at Jen's house. We hung out and visited for a few minutes and then it was just killing me as to how to drop the bomb on her. So we thanked Jen and she just smiled and said it was nothing. Tom and I shared a brief smile and I said, "No. Thank you for making it all possible" and held out my hand so she could see the ring.

Jen's eyes got so big and there was a long pause. The kids practically climbed over her to see what she is looking at and I asked the kids, "Do you know what that is?" To which the princess replied, "A ring!" Ok. So maybe I didn't phrase the question right.

"It's an engagement ring. Do you know what that means?" They both shook their heads no and waited. "It means Tom and I are going to get married." The kids cheer followed by the princess shouting, "I'M GETTING A BABY BROTHER!" And Jen quickly follows up with, "YES!"

If it wasn't for Jen taking time out of her life to help us, Tom would probably have proposed during the commercial break of CSI. It just wouldn't have been the same.

Thank you, JEN!

Valentine's Day and the proposal.

I am not a romantic. I love romantic things, I recognize it when I see it, but when it comes to making romantic plans, I just draw a big blank. So this year, I toiled to come up with a really sweet and romantic gift. Mind you I have already come up with is Father's Day and birthday plan for this year, but Valentine's kept getting closer and closer and I had nothing. Thank goodness for me, I have a romantic fiancee. Yes fiancee! Let me tell you the story.

So the daycare has a special Valentine's event for the kids were they stay at the center until 10 pm. They do dinner and movies and what not with the kids the Friday before Valentine's so parents can go out and have a romantic night out.

Tom seizes this brass rings and signs the kids up on Thursday and tells me that he wants to go to a really nice restaurant. We plan to use this night as our Valentine's day. Tom then ups the ante when I ask him want he wants by saying, "I want a unique gift that proves to me that you know me better than anyone else."

All those who don't have a gift or a plan, please raise your hand. Feeling pressure? No. I can admit when I am just sunk.

So Friday my focus is I HAVE to get a present. Most of the morning is spent at a corporate awards banquet where I win a lotto for some roses. BONUS! I am on my way to a Valentine's gift. So I chatter all morning my friend, Jen, about what should I get him? Jen suggests lingerie and I quickly throw that out. I want a serious present. On my lunch break I photoshop a picture and have it printed and framed. I get some Godiva chocolates and tada. Done. I have the spread covered. Flowers, chocolates and a photo. I even printed a little poem and made a card. I am feeling pretty good at this point.

I race home to shower and wrap his present before we go to dinner and I walk in the door to find a letter from Tom. It says that he has boarded the dogs, the kids are spending the night with Jen and that I need to pack an overnight bag that he has reservations for us in a couple of hours.

Thank the heavens that no ones was there to see the blank look on my face as my mind races to process this information. I never saw this coming. Heck, I had been talking to Jen all day and she never once slipped up and spilled the beans. At the same time, I'm thinking that this seemed a little much for a Valentine's present. I mean I was thrilled with just the romantic dinner. I look down at my chocolates and card and flowers and frame and think, "CRAP, I should have gotten the lingerie!!"

I race upstairs to wrap Tom's present and hope that I have enough time to start packing before he gets home and we need to leave. Enter Tom, stage right.

I rush downstairs to greet Tom and let him know how blown away I am and he greets me at the door with my favorite Starbucks. This man had me at "hi hunnie."

He patiently waits while I run around and try to gather myself. He puts my bag into the car and I notice that his suitcase is already in there, but there isn't a gift bag. So is the hotel my gift? No gift means more than just a Valentine's present. And now my mind is really racing. Here I am in my casual work clothes, grungy and I am pretty sure I smell sweaty from all of the running around and I am on they way to a romantic night out that could to turn out to be something more?

He drives us downtown to a little hotel in Harbor Town called the River Inn. There is a restaurant downstairs, a roaring little fire in the front lobby and they pour us drinks while we checked-in. We go up to our room and it was precious. It felt less like a hotel and more like a bed and breakfast. There were a dozen gorgeous red roses on the table and a plate of chocolate covered strawberries. It was picture perfect!

Before going to dinner, we agreed to exchange gifts. By now I am really hating this stupid picture I got him, when from his suitcase he pulls a gift bag. It is hard to explain, but in that instant I went from feeling dumb about my present to dumb about turning a really romantic night out into some excuse to worry. He pulled all the stops out for me and here I am ruining with all the worrying and making myself crazy. I resign myself to enjoying the moment. Tom planned everything and the least I could do was appreciate every minute.

He opens my present and smiles. It is us.

We love each other as though we were kids. Without the fear of the pain that we have been through before. Seeing only how this could last forever and how nothing could come between us. The chocolate was over kill because the strawberries along would put us in a diabetic comma.

I open my gift bag and I to find a brand new red 12 mega pixal digital camera. LOVE! Made only more prefect by the fact that in my rush to get ready, I left my camera at home. Tom knows me so well.

We sit on the side of the bed, our feet dangling and then he gives me a card. Inside he wrote, will you be my Valentine forever? I smile up at him, said yes and kissed him. And he pulls a white jewelry box out of his pocket and asks, "Then will you be my wife?"

"Oh yes."